Without Love

 I Corinthians 13:1-13

January 30, 2022

 

A few years ago, there was a video on YouTube that went absolutely viral. The video was called “Kevin and Jill’s wedding.” I first heard about the video because it was parodied on the television show, “The Office,” when two characters on that show, Pam and Jim, got married.

But as far as I know, Kevin and Jill are real people, and this was their real wedding. The video starts out just moments before the bridal party is about to walk down the aisle. At first glance, it looks any other wedding. There are ushers handing out wedding programs. You can sense the anticipation and excitement in the wedding guests gathered. Then all of a sudden, BAM!

A pop song begins to play that is definitely not your typical wedding processional. The two ushers who were handing out wedding bulletins suddenly fling the programs into the air and begin to dance their way down the aisle. Then before you can fully take in what just happened, two bridesmaids process in, also dancing down the aisle. Then the best man and the maid of honor bebop their way down the aisle together. Then the ushers and the bridesmaids and the groomsman all begin to dance together. They gather around the door leading into the church, and viola! The groom somersaults his way through them, dancing his way to the front.

Finally, the music reaches its peak, and there she is! The bride. In some weddings, the music changes for the bride to process, but she isn’t going to be left out of this choreographed wedding extravaganza. She too boogies her way down the aisle and is met halfway by her husband-to-be, who escorts her, arm and arm, the rest of the way. 

            My description does the video no justice. As silly as it sounds, the first time I watched it I was overwhelmed – not overwhelmed to do this at our wedding – but overwhelmed still. This couple was obviously so full of joy, that it seemed completely natural and normal that they grooved their way to their marriage vows. The only person who doesn’t get to take part in the dancing was the pastor. If it would have been me, I’d have been dancing at the front of the church. But I digress.

            The video that the public sees ends as the bride and groom finish the processional, so we don’t know what their vows were like. We don’t know what else was said or preached, and we don’t know the scripture that was read, but I wonder if it was this familiar and much-loved passage from I Corinthians.

            This is often the go-to scripture for weddings. What words could be more fitting, more appropriate for a ceremony when two people pledge their lives together than these profoundly beautiful words about love from Paul’s letter to the church in Corinth? They are all about love, after all; what love is and what love isn’t. Perfect for a wedding.

            However, Richard Hays, a commentator and scholar with the Interpretation series of biblical commentaries disagrees. He writes “the first task for the interpreter of I Corinthians 13 is to rescue the text from the quagmire of romantic sentimentality in which popular piety has embedded it. The common use of this text in weddings has linked it in the minds of many with flowers and kisses and frilly wedding dresses. Such images are far removed from Paul’s original concerns.” 

            Paul did not write these words to a young couple giddy with love, eager to marry. Paul wrote these to a church in chaos and conflict. The Corinthians have taken spiritual gifts and turned them into a hierarchy – with some being better and more important than others. They have squabbled over table rituals, and some have claimed that those who have lived in the faith longer have no need to worry about the faith of newer members. The Corinthians have misunderstood, misinterpreted, and just missed the point of what Paul tried to teach them about being a church in the name of and for the sake of Jesus the Christ.

            So, if Paul is writing these words of love to this congregation, maybe we need to read between the lines a little bit to get the full gist of his meaning.

            “Love is patient – and you have not been. Love is kind – and you aren’t. Love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude – and you have been all these things. It does not insist on its own way – and you have. It is not irritable or resentful – and you are. It does not rejoice in wrongdoing – but you have. It rejoices in the truth – and you have done the opposite. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things – but have you?”

            And, to skip back a few verses, even if you are doing the right thing, the correct action, if you do it without love – not romantic love, not sentimental love, but agape love, the kind of love that God shows for us through Jesus, the kind of love that Jesus demonstrated over and over again – then your actions and words have lost their meaning. They ring hollow. They are like a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.

            Paul has already told them in verses that we have heard in the past two weeks that they – and we – are all members of one body. Every member, no matter what gifts they bring, no matter who they are in society, is necessary and needed. We are all members of one body, and we need each other, and because of this, because we need each other, we need to figure out to love one another. And I’m not talking about warm, fuzzy love either. I’m talking about love that is a verb. Love that is an action. Love that is about doing, doing for the other, serving the other, striving for the other. So, Paul writes these words about what love is.

            And they are profound words indeed. And when I have used them at weddings where I have officiated, I have encouraged the couple standing before me that the time to really hear these words, to lean on them, is not in this moment when everything is wonderful and rosy and exciting, but when things get tough. When there is too much month left at the end of the money, when the kids are sick, when jobs are lost, when anger and irritation bubble up. That is when you need these words of love. That is when you need to remember, most fervently, what love is and what love isn’t.

            And this is not advice only for married couples. It is advice for all of us. Paul wrote these words to a struggling congregation. He wrote them to imperfect people living imperfect lives. They rang true for the first readers and hearers, and they resonate with us as well. Because no matter how hard we try we are always imperfect when it comes to love. We are always imperfect at how we live out love. Love for God, love for one another, love as an active verb, should be our foundation and our guiding star. But the routine of life, the frustrations of life, the weariness of life gets in the way. But without love, we are like those Corinthians, misunderstanding and missing the point. Without love, my words from this pulpit fall flat. Without love, our work on session and in ministry units and in the community misses the mark. Without love, we are like noisy gongs and clanging cymbals.

            And remember, this is not about love that we necessarily feel. This is about love that we do. We’re not going to always feel love for one another. Married couples don’t always feel it. Parents and children don’t always feel it. Friends don’t always feel it. Congregations don’t always feel it. But we are called to do love, to live love, to act with love.

            In a few minutes we are going to install and ordain the newest class of ruling elders for this congregation. I can think of no better words to lead up to this moment in the life of our church, than these from the 13^th chapter in I Corinthians. Because the work that these elders do, that all members of the session does, must be based in the kind of love that Paul wrote of in this letter. I won’t kid myself or anyone else that living lives based in this kind of love is easy. It’s not. Loving this kind of love is hard. It’s challenging. It takes everything we have and more to love in this way. But it is also our highest calling. The four people who are about to be ordained and installed have answered a call to serve. But we have all answered that call, in one way or another, just by being here. We have answered the call to serve … and to love.

            None of us are going to get right. All of us are going to fail and fall and struggle. But the love that we are called to live is the love that God has for us. God loves us this way. God’s love for us is a verb. God’s love for us was embodied in Jesus. God’s love for us manifests itself through the power of the Holy Spirit, that gives us the courage and the strength to keep on trying, to keep on loving. Because God loves us, we are able to love. Because God loves us, we can love. Because God loves us, we are never, ever without love. Thanks be to God.

            Let all of God’s loved and loving children say, “Alleluia.” Amen.